Cart Before The Horse Page 13

  That was too much of a burden on her. She felt the pain in her chest again. “I’m not her. You can’t just replace her.”

  “I’m not. I’m moving on.” He pulled her into his arms. “You told your parents you were going to marry me. That meant you were going to try to live a life with me and our baby.”

  “My mother and I went and bought my dress,” she said

  softly.

  He pulled back to look at her. “Is it here? Can I see it?”

  She let out a little laugh. “No and no.” She stepped away from him and paced a circle before looking back at him standing in her living room looking so handsome. “I came by the other night because I had something I wanted to tell you.”

  “What was it?”

  “I had a talk with the baby.”

  “You talked to the baby?”

  She smiled and rested her hands on her stomach. “Yes. Before my meeting. And it was as if suddenly everything made sense. I knew right then and there I want this baby and I want the life that comes with it.” She sighed and looked back up at him. “Then later I was standing in my wedding dress, and I knew at that moment I wanted you. I love you.”

  The expression on his face went blank. She wanted to cry, but she wasn’t going to. Damn her hormones for turning every emotion to tears. If he didn’t love like he’d led her to believe he did, well then to hell with him. She would just…

  “Say it again,” he said.

  “This isn’t a game, Gabe.”

  “Say it again.” He moved closer to her.

  “I said I love you.”

  “I never thought you’d ever say that.” He slid his arms around her waist. “I’ve dreamed you’d say it, but I didn’t think you would.”

  “I’m not just some cold, inhuman thing, you know.”

  “I know. But you’re a little stubborn.” He nipped her lips with a kiss. “Say it again.”

  The pain in her chest eased, and her entire body became pliant in his arms. “I love you.”

  He kissed her. He kissed her with a power she’d never been kissed, and she wrapped her arms around his neck and held on tight. She wanted him to love her as they should have before they’d climbed into bed together. She wanted to feel

  him hold her and pull her under with his passion for her.

  “Wait.” He pulled back and rested his forehead to hers. “I just realized something.” He took a step back and got down on his knee. “I never asked you to marry me, properly.”

  “Gabe,” she laughed. “Get up. I think we’re way past

  this point.”

  “No. We talked about it. You shook off my very meek proposal and accepted a ring your father gave to me under a misconception.” He took her hand and looked up at her. “Holly Jacobs, will you please do me the honor of marrying me and be my wife?”

  She smiled until her cheeks hurt. “Yes. I will marry you. And I look forward to being your wife.”

  He stood. “And will you consider having more children with me?”

  She felt the blood drain from her face, but she held on to him tightly to keep herself from swaying. “You sure know how to take a moment and keep going, don’t you?”

  “Do you love me?” He bent his head and grazed her neck with a kiss.

  She let out a sigh and closed her eyes. “Yes.”

  “You’ll marry me?”

  “Yes.”

  “For now that’s all I need.” He repeated the trail he’d kissed down her neck. “I want to take you and buy you a ring.” His lips were in her hair, and her entire body tingled with his touches.

  “My ring is fine.”

  “No. I intend to buy you something gaudy and sparkly.”

  She giggled as his hands moved under the back of her shirt and he touched her skin. “If you insist.”

  His phone rang and his kisses stopped, but he held her a moment longer before reaching for it in his pocket. “Gabe here.” He nodded and grunted then hung up. “I have to go.”

  “Guess that’s a good thing. I’m not dressed to be seduced.”

  “I think lingerie is overrated. I’m totally turned on by your flannel pajama pants and T-shirt.”

  His voice was so thick with desire, she believed him. “I’ll see you tomorrow.”

  “I can come back tonight.” He picked up his coat that he’d draped over a chair and tugged it on. “It’ll be late, but I need to spend a night with you. One where you don’t disappear.”

  Guilt landed in her stomach like a piece of lead. She didn’t answer. Instead, she walked to the kitchen and opened a cupboard door. She took down the spare key that sat on a shelf. She walked back, opened his hand, and placed the key in his palm.

  “This is yours.” She curled his fingers around it. “So is

  my home.”

  She watched his eyes go wide. “I love you.”

  “We love you too,” she said as she took his hand and rested it on her stomach.

  He stood for a moment and his eyes lingered on their hands. When he shifted his eyes back to hers, she saw what she needed to see. She’d moved him nearly to tears. She’d opened up to him, and that was what he needed. He was all hers now. He belonged to her and the baby, and there was no looking back.

  Gabe moved in and kissed her cheek. “I’ll see you later.” He walked to the door and opened it. He turned back to her. “Thank you for putting me to bed and then helping out.”

  “Chandra and her big mouth.”

  He laughed. “She said you’re a keeper.”

  “That’s what she told me.”

  He looked down at the key in his hand then gripped it tight. His lips curled into a tight smile and he lingered in her doorway. “I appreciate what you did. I’m a pretty lucky man.”

  Holly leaned against the door as he stepped out into the hall. “You might reconsider that when I pick out a ring. I have very good taste.”

  “I’ll remember that.” He kissed the tips of his fingers and

  blew it her way as he walked away.

  She watched after him until he was gone. She shut the door and leaned against it. Why had she warded off such happiness before? Being in love was wonderful. She was getting married and having a baby. And that night the man she loved would spend the first night of the rest of their lives in her bed.

  She looked down at her pajamas and laughed. If he was serious, then he’d be very happy to find her still dressed in the same attire when he got to bed. Would he be disappointed in the outfit Tracy had picked for her for their wedding night, she wondered.

  There was so much to do before he got back home. She liked the way that sounded.

  But first she was going to change the sheets, put out clean towels, and she had to have a toothbrush somewhere she could set out for him. Holly scurried to her bedroom. She began pulling off her sheets and caught sight of her closet. She dropped the sheets back onto the bed and opened the door. It was packed full of her clothes. Where would he put his things?

  This wasn’t going to work. She wasn’t ready for a man to live with her. Panic set in. Where in the hell were they going to put the baby? There was no room in her little piece of the world for a man, let alone a child.

  She sat on the edge of the bed and gathered the sheets up in her arms. Everything was bigger than she’d ever planned. How was she going to make it all work? She began to sob, her arms wrapped around the four-hundred thread-count sheets that she’d picked for herself, on the bed only she’d ever slept in. She wiped her tears on their softness, and she continued until she fell asleep among the pile that now wrapped around her like a cocoon keeping her from emerging into a new and unknown future.

  Chapter Nine

  Sleep hadn’t come for her once they had fixed the sheets and both climbed into her bed at four o’clock. Gabe had been in a mood when he scooted in close behind her, wrapped her in his arms, and fallen quickly asleep.

  Now she lay there and listened to him breathe.

  She’d never fallen asleep with
a man in her bed. Her bed. Her house. Her world was being invaded, but even though it set her into an absolute panic, there was a sweetness in knowing Gabe wanted to be there wrapped in her soft, feminine sheets.

  She was thirty years old, pregnant, and finally in love. How could it have all come so quickly? Holly smiled as she gave his arm a squeeze. It was all so wonderfully backward, and for the first time in her life she embraced that.

  A glance at the clock and she knew she wouldn’t be getting any more sleep. She crept out of bed and readied herself for a day at the office. Eventually Tracy was bound to send her home to rest, but until then she’d drag herself to work and try not to be too distracted by the fact that the man she loved was still lying in her bed.

  When she arrived at the office later that morning, it was quiet and she was glad that no one would be talking to her or asking her questions. She hadn’t been focused enough on the new contract, which she’d be working on exclusively. She needed to concentrate on doing her very best work.

  Holly turned on her stereo, put on her smock, and got busy refining her designs.

  It was well past nine when Tracy finally walked through the door carrying two mugs. She closed it behind her with her hip and set the mugs on Holly’s desk. The aroma lifted from the murky liquid inside, and Holly moved back from the steam.

  “I say this with love. You look like crap and very happy about it.” Tracy sat down in a chair and curled her feet up under her long skirt. She picked up one of the mugs and cradled it between her hands. “Tell me about your evening.” She lifted the mug to her mouth, but Holly could see the grin that emerged from behind it.

  “What is it you want me to tell you?”

  “You have that”—she gave her a look that scanned from head to toe—“rumpled-in-the-sheets look about you.”

  Holly laughed as Tracy finally drank her tea. She walked around the desk, picked up her mug, and sat down next to her, placing her hand over the liquid, which now made her

  stomach churn.

  “He spent the night.”

  Tracy wiggled in her seat. “I knew it.”

  “Well, it was more like he spent a few hours sleeping in my bed with me. He didn’t get there until four this morning, and I climbed out of bed at six thirty.”

  “That’s enough time for a lot of fun.”

  “Or sleep.”

  Tracy let out a groan. “Sleep, huh? Well it doesn’t sound like as much fun, but it sounds nice. I’m happy for you.”

  “Thank you.” Holly set down the tea without drinking it and walked back to her drafting table. “You know, I never did ask, I guess I assumed you’d just be part of it, but would you be my maid of honor?”

  Tracy jumped from her seat, tea splashing onto the floor, and scooped Holly into her arms before she knew what had happened. Tracy let out a squeal. “Oh, of course. How

  exciting.”

  It was exciting and extremely scary. A ripple of humor ran

  through her as Tracy let go of her and went back to her tea. She was as frightened and as excited about getting married as she had been about wrapping Chandra’s bushes in toilet paper. Perhaps it was time to take everything to the next level. A few hours of watching Gabe sleep wasn’t going to satisfy her forever. She was human, after all, and she’d openly admitted she was in love. What would he think if she turned up the heat a bit?

  Gabe walked through the front door of the restaurant. Chandra sat behind the bar, her clipboard in her hand, taking inventory. “Mornin’.”

  “Shut up.” She made marks on the chart she held in her hands. “Finally get some?”

  Her tone let him know that his attitude, when he’d left the night before, hadn’t been the best. “I got some sleep.”

  “Romantic.” She shook her head. “Moving in?”

  He sat down at the bar. Chandra put down her chart and poured him a cup of coffee. She set it down in front of him and leaned on the counter.

  He took his first sip and inched toward Chandra. “I don’t think she’ll appreciate me moving in my things.” The thought stung.

  She picked up her chart again. “She’s already decided you’re a slob, eh?”

  “She said she had a moment when she realized there wasn’t room for my stuff in her closet and there wasn’t room for a baby either.” He pressed the cup between his palms. Neither of them had room in their current homes. But it was more than there not just being room. It was obvious that it bothered her to let go of her own space—or to have him in it.

  The lines deepened in Chandra’s forehead, and she dropped her chart back to the bar. “What does she expect from you? She messes with your head about marrying you. Then invites you over and doesn’t even have sex with you. But she

  won’t let you move in? What, are you going to be married, have

  a baby, and live across town from each other? It’s stupid. I think I’ll tell her.”

  He laughed. Chandra had been a vital part in his taking back his life when he’d moved to Denver. He wasn’t sure why he was surprised that she made it easier to deal with his feelings for Holly too.

  “Don’t give her a slap in the face yet. I’m meeting someone today, and it just might make things easier.”

  “You’re kicking her to the curb when she’s three months pregnant with your baby?”

  He laughed again. “No. My friend Doug is meeting me here in an hour. He’s a real estate agent and has a few houses in the area he thinks would be good for us.”

  Her eyes shot open wide. “You’re going to look at houses without her? You are dumb, aren’t you?”

  “Not a good idea?”

  Chandra shrugged. “You don’t seem to ever want my advice anyway. If you had, you would have listened when I told you to pour her in a cab that night and get her number. Instead you took her to a hotel, knocked her up, and forgot to get

  the number.”

  He rubbed his forehead where a headache was building. “She’s at work. She just picked up a big client. I can’t just barge in and make her leave.”

  “Go with your friend and look. If you find something, make sure you let her walk through it before you close the deal. Remember, it’s not all about Gabe Maguire anymore.” She pointed a threatening finger his way. “You have a family and you need to include them.”

  She was good. “Okay. I’ll do that.” He hopped off the stool and headed back toward his office before he turned around to her again. “I need to buy a big gaudy diamond for her for the wedding.”

  “What’s wrong with the ruby?”

  “It’s not from me. How do I handle that? Do I let her

  pick it out?”

  “Hell no.”

  He rubbed his chin and remembered he’d forgotten to pack his razor in the bag he’d taken to Holly’s. He’d have to go upstairs and do that before Doug arrived. “What do I do?”

  “Pay me to go with you. We’ll pick one out and you can surprise her with it. Then if she doesn’t like it you can exchange it.”

  “Don’t buy a house. Do buy a diamond.” He shook his head. “Anything else?”

  “Tell her how beautiful she is when she starts getting fat, but never tell her how big she is. And understand that no matter what, you’re not in charge of naming the baby. But you can pretend that you have an opinion.”

  He walked back to his office with a smile on his face. Oh yeah, he remembered being married. He didn’t have a lot of say in anything. This time wasn’t going to be any different, except that he was older and perhaps more patient. With Holly, and the baby, that would be an asset. Now he just had to manage that fine line between her happiness and her walking away with his heart. He didn’t think he could afford to feel the loss over a woman again.

  Holly was exhausted. Normally she could put in a full day plus a few hours, but now a few hours of work and she wanted a nap. She sat down on the couch, kicked up her feet, and the thought that she should go to the restaurant and make dinner for Gabe crossed her mind. Then again, may
be she’d call and see if he could sneak away for a dinner break at her house. Oh, and she was going to seduce him into bed. She’d almost forgotten.

  For a moment, she decided, she was going to close her eyes and rest. It was still early enough she could get him some dinner and satisfy her need to take care of him. Then before he returned to her bed, she could work on how to seduce him. She’d

  never seduced a man, but she was sure she wouldn’t have to

  work too hard at it. He seemed plenty interested in her.

  Holly closed her eyes and rested her hands on her stomach.

  It was the second night he’d come home to her and again the lights were on and so was the TV. This time, however, she was asleep on the couch, still in the suit jacket and skirt she’d worn to work. One hand draped over her head and the other rested on her stomach. It was a sight he was sure he could quickly get used to.

  Standing across the room admiring her, he knew he loved her more than he’d imagined he could love another person. Those two months when she only haunted his dreams seemed like forever ago. The past few weeks with her had changed his life, and damn if it wasn’t only going to get better.

  He hung his coat on the back of the chair and figured he’d have to ask her where she preferred it. Knowing how precise she was with everything, he suspected a coat hanging on furniture was not acceptable. His mother was the very same way. He smiled. Wouldn’t they love each other? They were so alike in so many ways. Perhaps it would be his mother who could convince her that having a child—or two, or three—wouldn’t disrupt her career path. It would only offer more people in her life to share her joys and sorrows. Thinking about it, he was sure only her father and Tracy held that position now. But he was due for some of the sharing too.