A Second Chance Read online

  Carlos placed his hand atop Eduardo’s and nodded. “She’s very, very sick.” He saw Clara’s eyes begin to pool and soon the tears had fallen. He reached for her and she climbed up on his lap. “She doesn’t want you to worry about her, and she’d be sad if she knew you were.”

  “What’s wrong with her?” The question came from Christian, who usually sat quietly.

  Again, Carlos took a deep breath. “Your mom has breast cancer.”

  “Oh, God!” Eduardo’s eyes filled with tears.

  Christian pushed from the table and went to his room.

  “Listen, that’s why she had surgery. Hopefully, they got all of the cancer and she’ll be fine. She’ll have another procedure in a few days to take out some tubes they had to leave in there. She’ll have to go through chemo, and then she’ll have some reconstruction done.” Kathy lifted her hand to her chest and batted away tears he saw lingering in her eyes. He looked at Clara. Her face was creased with confusion. Eduardo’s face, on the other hand, was set in anger. He understood that. He was angry with Madeline for not telling him the truth. He was mad at Matt for leaving her. And he was pissed off at the cancer for attacking the woman he loved. “But for now she’s in the hospital and they’re keeping a close eye on her.”

  “Why wouldn’t she tell us? That’s not fair. She can’t do this to us.” Eduardo shook his head squeezed his hands into fists, popping his knuckles as he did so.

  “She’s scared. She found out she had cancer the day after Matt left. She feels that if you know she’s sick you’ll treat her differently. All she wants to do is take care of you. But now she needs us to take care of her. We’re all going to help her through this.”

  “Your dad is right. We’re all going to help her,” Kathy added.

  Carlos smiled through his pain. “Thank you. You sure are amazing.”

  “I want to see her,” Clara whispered against his chest.

  “You will. We’re going down there to see her tomorrow. She’s going to be mad as hell at me for it, but I don’t really care. She needs you, and once you’re there, she’ll understand. I’m going to go call Grandma and Grandpa too. They wanted to be here, but their flight was delayed until tomorrow.” He kissed the top of Clara’s head. “Now I have to find Matt. He really should know what’s going on.” Even if Matt didn’t come to be with her—and that thought had Carlos’s blood boiling.

  “Mommy’s really lucky you still love her so much,” Clara said. Carlos knew she didn’t mean any harm in her comment, but his eyes darted toward Kathy’s and he saw the flash of pain.

  Chapter Three

  Carlos peeked around the door and watched Madeline as she shifted to see him. He’d expected her to look better, but her skin was pale, her eyes sunken and dark. His stomach knotted. “Good morning, beautiful. How are you feeling?”

  “Like I was run over by a truck,” she said softly as tears filled her eyes.

  He walked to the side of the bed and gathered her hand in his. “What’s wrong?”

  “I’m scared. I’m so scared.”

  “Oh, baby.” He pressed a kiss to her forehead. “You need to think positive. What you went through yesterday was enormous. One step at a time.”

  She nodded and took a deep breath. “What are you doing here?”

  “I told you I was going to come back and take care of you.”

  “I’m not your responsibility anymore.”

  “Yes, you are. You’re very important to me,” he said, and that pang of guilt was back. The look in Kathy’s eyes when Carla had said he still loved Madeline flashed in his mind. But he knew Kathy understood. “I have a surprise for you.”

  “For me?”

  “Are you up for it?”

  She nodded.

  “Okay, I’ll be right back.”

  A moment later, he returned with Eduardo, Clara, and Christian. Each of them held a long-stemmed rose.

  Her eyes opened wide and weak smile settled on her lips. “Oh, my babies.” She began to sob, and Christian stopped his progression into the room, but Carlos pulled him in.

  Eduardo advanced toward her first and kissed her. “Hey, Mom. You doing okay?”

  “Yeah. I’m doing okay.” She smiled and moved her hand to grasp his.

  “Why didn’t you tell us? You should have told us.”

  “I know. I just didn’t want you to worry about me.”

  His lips thinned and he looked away then back at her. “I was already worried about you. I knew you were sick.”

  Clara couldn’t speak through her tears. She walked to her mother and rested her head on the pillow next to her, and Madeline nuzzled against her with her cheek. “It’s okay, baby. I’m okay.”

  Christian kept his distance, but he smiled when she looked at him.

  Carlos knew they had their ways of dealing with things. He excused himself and stood outside of the room. There was a long road ahead of them. He had to decide how to deal with the fact that they needed each other, but he also needed to distance himself. There was no way he’d let her be alone. Damnit, it hadn’t been a lie. He needed her. She was an intrinsic part of his life. But now he had Kathy and he had to watch his step. He’d lost sleep over seeing the pain caused when Clara said he loved Madeline. Who wouldn’t be pissed by something like that? Worse yet, he hadn’t—couldn’t have—corrected her. He’d never stopped loving Madeline.

  There had always been that small part of him that secretly wished for Matt to leave so he could reclaim his wife. Who’d have thought the opportunity would arise the moment he fell in love with someone else?

  He pulled the slip of paper from his pocket and dialed his cell phone. There were still enough connections to Matt Carson, and he’d known who to ask. He dialed the number.

  “Matt, it’s Carlos.” Irritation filtered through his voice, but there was no way to hide it as he told the man who’d once been his best friend that the woman they’d both loved had cancer.

  He returned to the hospital later that evening after taking the kids home and feeding them dinner. Kathy was edgy and he couldn’t blame her. She was being a great sport, and he’d make it up to her. When Madeline was healthy and home, he figured he’d ask Kathy to marry him. After all, he’d made the phone call to Matt Carson himself. The man was already in the car and heading back to Nashville before he’d hung up. Carlos wouldn’t stand in the way.

  He scrubbed his hands over his face. The heavy stubble on his cheek reminded him he’d forgotten to shave that morning. He’d been in such a hurry to get to Madeline’s side.

  He tapped on her door and she invited him in. This time she looked happy, and the glow had returned to her skin. She looked stiff sitting in her bed, and he knew the bandages wrapped around her made her uncomfortable. There would be time to deal with that, he thought. She’d be upset the first time they let her see what they’d done to her.

  “You look better.”

  “I feel better. I hate you for bringing the kids, but thanks. That really helped me out.”

  He leaned in and kissed her cheek. “I know you pretty well.”

  “Did my parents ever get on the plane?”

  He laughed as he pulled the chair to her bedside. “Yes, they finally got a flight. They’ll be here soon. He took her hand and absentmindedly kissed her fingers.

  Madeline nodded. “I owe you. This was bigger than me. I was afraid I was going to die. I couldn’t handle it.”

  “You’re going to be fine and I’ll be here for you.”

  “No, you won’t.”

  His head snapped up.

  Madeline lowered her hand slowly to the bed. “You’ve started a new life. You really need to focus on Kathy and building a life together. I’m just in your way.”

  “I don’t think it matters right now. Right now I’m focused on seeing you through this.”

  “Well, I don’t want you to. Mom and Dad will take care of me.”

  “So you’re just dismissing me?”

  Her eyes shif
ted away from him. “Yes.”

  “It’s not important to you to have me here?”

  “I appreciate it. I’ve thanked you. Now I think you should go. They’re sending me home soon. Trust me. You’ll just be in the way when my mom gets here.”

  He stood and raked his fingers through his hair. “I can’t believe you. I can’t believe you’d just push me to the side. I want to take care of you.”

  “Carlos, I’m not yours to take care of.”

  He could feel his heart being squeezed by her words, and his body temperature began to rise as his anger surfaced. “And whose fault is that?”

  “Excuse me?”

  “Nothing,” he said throwing his hands in the air. “Nothing.”

  “Listen, we ended this five years ago. Move on.”

  “That’s what you want?”

  “Yes.”

  “Fine. Tell your parents I’ll bring the kids anytime. I’m gone.” He turned and walked out of the room with his hands balled into fists by his sides. If he were anywhere but the damn hospital, he’d put his fist through the wall. How dare she dismiss him like that? When you loved someone you wanted to take care of her.

  He stopped in the middle of the hall and let the thought wash over him.

  Of course he loved her. They shared a family. But she was right. She wasn’t his to worry about anymore. The thought made him sick, but he walked out of the hospital knowing this was what she wanted, no matter how wrong he thought she was.

  As soon as the door closed, Madeline let lose the flood of tears that she’d been holding back. That had been the hardest thing she’d done since the day they both decided separating was best for them. She sank down in her bed and sobbed.

  Her heart was breaking, and that hurt worse than the throbbing in her chest from her stitches and bandages. She loved him. She loved him so much. How could she hurt him by tearing him from the woman he now loved? He’d hate her for it if Kathy ever left. She’d done the right thing. No matter how much it hurt her, she had to make sure he moved on.

  “Madeline?”

  She turned as the door opened and Matt walked through. The pain that rolled in her stomach from telling Carlos to leave had balled into a solid mass of anger when she saw Matt’s face. She didn’t want him there, and someone had told him what had happened.

  Carlos drove around the block four times, trying to control his anger before he pulled into the driveway.

  Damn her! He’d always wanted the best for her, and damnit, now he wanted to help her. Well, fine! He’d done what he could and that was all he could do.

  He threw the car into park. Damnit! He hit the steering wheel and threw his head back against the seat. Why did it have to continue to be so hard?

  Turning his head toward the house, he saw Kathy standing on the back step, watching him. She gave him a smile, but he assumed it was as forced as it looked. He blew out another breath. To hell with it. He was going to move on.

  “Hey,” was all he could think to say as he climbed out of the car.

  She walked down the steps and into his arms. “Hey.”

  He held her there, taking in the comfort of her love. She tipped her head back and looked at him. “Is she doing better today?”

  “Yeah, she’s fine. Matt should be there now.” He realized he hadn’t told her Matt’d said he’d stop by. That would have Madeline even more pissed at him. It wasn’t his concern, he had to remember that. She was very clear about it. “Her parents will be there in the morning. They’ll take care of her.”

  “You did right calling Matt and taking the kids.”

  “I suppose.” He gazed into her deep blue eyes. Her hair was pulled back, and it gave him the perfect view of her beautiful face. “Thank you for being so understanding. I don’t think everyone in your position would have been.”

  “She’s the mother of your children. I’d expect you to care.”

  Well, at least Kathy understood it even if Madeline didn’t. “I love you,” he said and swallowed hard past the lump in his throat.

  “I love you too.”

  “I’ve been thinking.” He pulled her in tighter. “Marry me.”

  She laughed a nervous laugh. “Wow, I didn’t see that coming.”

  “I don’t see any reason I should wait to ask. Will you marry me?”

  She didn’t answer right away. Maybe his luck with the women in his life was in a bad way today. “You can think about it.”

  “I’ve done that a lot lately.” Kathy wrapped her arms around his neck and pressed a warm, accepting kiss to his lips. “I would be honored to be your wife.”

  Madeline had drifted off to sleep while she was talking to Matt. When she opened her eyes, he was still there. “I’m sorry. These pain medications make me so tired.”

  “No, it’s okay.” His voice cracked, and she knew he was nervous being in her presence. He never had dealt with crisis or illness well. It was why he’d decided to move to Kentucky. It was easier for him to run away from all of his problems than to stay and face them. “I talked to your nurse. I was trying to see how things were going for you, but she said I wasn’t on the list so she couldn’t tell me anything.”

  “I’m sorry, again.” She shook her head. She was the one in the hospital, so why was the one saying sorry all the time? “I didn’t intend to tell you about the cancer. I didn’t intend to tell anyone.”

  “Carlos called me.”

  Madeline nodded. She should have known he would. Wasn’t it funny, as mad as she was at Matt for even standing there in front of her, she couldn’t be mad at Carlos. He always did what he thought was right. “I should have figured he’d find you somehow.”

  “He told me Curtis caught you.”

  “Yeah, I hadn’t even thought there’d be a chance he’d see me here.”

  He darted his eyes around the room, something he did when he couldn’t bear to be around someone.

  “How long will you be staying?” she asked, noting that the uneasy feeling between them was mutual.

  He cleared his throat and gave a glance toward the door and back to her. “Oh, I can stay as long as you’d like me to.”

  “My parents are on their way, so really you don’t need to uproot your life for me.”

  Again, he only nodded. The silence was suffocating her, and she knew he was as uncomfortable as she was. When he stood and paced the room with his hands in his pockets, she knew for a fact it would be the last time she’d see him. In his head he was working up one of his speeches—because Matt didn’t make excuses. When he was ready to tell you what was on his mind, he did. “This might not be the time to do this, but I want to apologize for everything that happened between us.”

  There was a heaviness in her chest, the kind that came with years of regret. “Matt, I think since the day we decided to get married, we knew it wasn’t going to be forever.”

  “Yeah.” He ran his fingers through his hair. “You deserved better than me. I never should have asked you to marry me. You were still in love with Carlos, and I ruined a twenty-year friendship with someone I considered my brother.”

  Damn the drugs. Tears were filling her eyes, and she shouldn’t care at this point. She was lying here bandaged up because they were trying to save her life. “Are you sorry you married me?”

  “No, I’m not sorry.” He cleared his throat again. “It was great, while it lasted.” Finally, he sat back down, and she adjusted to see him better. “It’s just that I think when two people share their lives, they should love each other. I mean…” He was stumbling through his words. “What I want to say is… well… I did love you. I loved you like one of my best friends. You know?” She nodded. That’s how she’d felt and she agreed. They should have been in love. “The hardest part was to know that you loved Carlos and you still do.”

  He was right again. It was always obvious that she loved Carlos more than she ever loved Matt. Acknowledging that only gave the pain she was feeling more depth as it drove into the pit of her stoma
ch.

  He stood again and paced. “God, this is killing me.”

  “Matt, what’s going on?” She tried to sit up, but the bandages and wires held her in place.

  “I shouldn’t have come.”

  “Then why did you?” Her voice slipped into anger, and by the look in his eyes he’d noticed.

  “I needed to make sure you were okay.”

  “I’m fine. I’ll live. For now anyway.”

  He pursed his lips. “That’s not funny.”

  “It’s not supposed to be.”

  “I’m getting married.” The words hit her like a fist in the stomach.

  “Married?”

  “Yeah. I didn’t want to tell you like this…”

  “My guess, Matthew, is that you didn’t want to tell me at all!” The anger inside of her ramped up her heart rate. She heard the beeping on the machine speed up, and she took a deep breath.

  “You should calm down.”

  “Go to hell. You’ve been gone one month. Did you move on so quickly? Did I mean so little?”

  He shot a look at the door again. “I think I should go.”

  “I think you should be honest with me.” The monitor to her side began beeping even faster, and she wondered if a nurse would burst through the door and make him leave, but no one came.

  “You want me to be honest?” For the first time he made eye contact with her. “Fine.” He stuffed his hands back into his pockets. “After Regan found out she was pregnant, you began pulling out pictures of you and Carlos and the kids. They were everywhere. You called him more often. You had lunch with him to discuss the kids. God, Madeline, it was like you had both of us on a string.”

  The deep breaths she’d been trying to take stuck in her lungs. She’d done that. She’d been that insensitive, and she didn’t know it. “I’m sorry if I got sentimental.”

  “It’s just that, well, I couldn’t get a grip on it. I couldn’t share in that joy with you. I didn’t love you like he loved you.” He sat back down and took her hand in his. “I strayed. God, it hurts to tell you that. I had an affair. I fell in love. I’ve never felt this way before.”